Even after Vera Coward stopped driving buses professionally, she never really stopped taking care of people.
If a friend, neighbor or family member needed a ride, Vera was often the person they called. To those who knew her, she was caring, generous and always willing to lend a hand.
Vera, affectionately known to family and friends as “Aunt Totsie,” was born on Sept. 20, 1959, in Columbia, South Carolina. The youngest of 13 children, she grew up with 10 brothers and two sisters. During the 1960s, the Coward family moved to Philadelphia and settled in Strawberry Mansion.
Vera attended Philadelphia public schools and later spent three years at Cheyney University. She went on to work as a SEPTA bus operator and, later, as a school bus driver. Both jobs suited her independent spirit and her ability to connect with all kinds of people.
In her later years, Vera devoted much of her time to caring for her mother. Looking after others was not simply something she did. It was part of who she was. She was not just a talker; she was a doer.
Her generosity extended well beyond giving people rides. She fed neighbors, opened her home to people who had fallen on hard times and encouraged them as they worked to get back on their feet. She also offered something just as valuable: a listening ear without judgment.
“Aunt Totsie was special to me,” her niece Tracey Oakman said. “I’ll never forget how she helped me when I was a traveling nurse. She always showed me and my son so much love.”
Her faith was an important part of her life. Vera was an avid churchgoer, and her desire to serve others could be seen in the way she lived each day.
She valued her family deeply. Vera was a devoted mother to her only son, Steven, and adored her granddaughters. Among her proudest moments were watching Steven graduate from high school and welcoming her first granddaughter into the world.
Aunt Totsie also knew how to enjoy life’s quieter pleasures. She loved to crochet and made gifts for relatives and members of her church, especially the newest babies. She enjoyed settling in with a good book or a movie and was always ready for a spirited game of Uno.
And then there was her cooking.
eAt family gatherings, everyone looked forward to Vera’s food—especially her macaroni and cheese. Cooking was another way she showed her love. A meal prepared by Aunt Totsie meant family, fellowship and plenty of laughter around the table.
Vera also knew what it meant to rebuild after hardship.
In 1994, while working as a bus operator, she was attacked by a man who boarded the bus she was driving. Vera defended herself during the confrontation, but the encounter ultimately led to her serving five years in prison. It was a difficult period, but it did not define the rest of her life.
After her release, Vera was determined to move forward. She continued to love her family, serve her community and make herself available to anyone who needed help. She understood hardship firsthand, and that understanding may have made her even more willing to offer others compassion rather than judgment.
The effect Vera had on those around her lives on in the memories they carry.
“I believe her life, her love and the many acts of kindness she gave so freely will continue to live through all of us who were blessed to know her,” Tracey added.
On July 25, 2019, Vera was shot during a dispute inside her home on the 2600 block of North 33rd Street. The argument involved her brother, who was experiencing serious mental health challenges. Her death brought tremendous pain to a family that loved them both.
Reflecting on that day, Tracey expressed what many members of the family felt: “We lost two people that day.”
